Listening Skills in Communication

Listening Skills in CommunicationCommunication is the headst wiz to person-to-person, financial, and entrepreneurial success. Seminars constantly tout the importance and crucial role of utile communication, especially in order to succeed at business. However, one aspect of communication expertnesss that is ofttimes overlooked is the effective riding habit of non-verbal communication. Non-verbal communication can be summed up as all the different parts of actors line that give us visual and non-audible clues in order to correctly interpret the sum and intent of the sayer in a conversation. Non verbal communication can be communicated through gestures and touch also known as Haptic communication by body language or posture, by facial expression and eye contact. Non verbal communication can crimson be communicated through objects such as clothing, hairstyles or even architecture, symbols and graphics.For example, when one goes to a job interview, khaki pants can convey a ra nge of meaning eitherwhere from oh, Im here to the well-dressed and ready to conquer, all base on the style, quality, cut, and fit of the pant. Simplistic yes, but tried and proven as well. By the selfsame(prenominal) token, wearing blue jeans to a job interview, no matter how dressy the pant, sends an underlying message of casualness that whitethorn not be the chord to strike, depending on the position and industry. Also, mother tongue contains nonverbal elements known as paralanguage, which include factors like voice quality, emotion and speaking style, as well as the spoken rhythm, word intonation or inflection and stress. Dance is also regarded as a nonverbal communication. Likewise, written texts have nonverbal elements such as handwriting style, spatial arrangement of run-in, graphical or design arrangements or the use of emoticons. However, much of the study of nonverbal communication has focused on face-to-face interaction, where it can be classified into three main f ocuses environmental conditions where communication push backs place, the strong-arm characteristics of the speakers, and behaviors of the speakers during interaction.While not a traditionally defined form of non verbal communication, effective audition skills are arguably the most prized set of communication skills for either businessperson to develop in order to achieve success. Furthermore, effective sense of construeing skills impact not only the professional sphere, but the individualised and emotional wellness and overall well being of a person. Many experts disagree on the number of specific components that encompass an effective listener, yet there are certain(a) key elements that are full generally accepted as guidelines to make a listener more effective and serve to enhance the quality of communication amid the involved parties. Listening is one of those special skills that, because we can strike, we tend to believe that we can automatically listen. Yet for many people hoping to facilitate, listening is the most tough skill to master. As I write this I am remembering one of todays well-worn clichs, lots used by those who arent listening I hear what you are saying, but.So says Mr. Trevor Bentley, who has developed a in truth specific set of criteria to define an effective listener.In his article, The special skills of listening, he states that specific situations require specific responses or set of listening skills. According to Bentley, one can narrow these instances to six main groups, which consist of monologue, dialogue, conversation, discussion, debate, and argument. Websters defines a monologue to be an extended uninterrupted speech by a character in a drama. The character may be speaking his or her thoughts aloud, directly addressing another character, or speaking to the audience, especially the former. Monologues are common across the range of dramatic media (plays, films, animation, etc.). In passing(a) life, a monologue refers to that one individual who talks incessantly upon all subjects, often without pause to consider the effect of any of their utterances upon those in their immediate vicinity. On the other hand, dialogue is an interaction of sorts, its everyday basis and counterpart is a colloquial exchange mingled with two or more people. Now, a conversation is by definition communication between multiple people. It is a social skill that can be accomplished by the average individual. Conversations are the ideal form of communication in some respects, since they allow people with different views on a topic to experience from one another. For a successful conversation, the partners must achieve a workable balance of contributions. A successful conversation includes repeating, answering, creating and countering connections between the speakers or things and topics that the speakers know. For this to happen, those engaging in conversation must find a topic on which they both can relate to in some sen se. They speak or from personal experience or from others observations and knowledge. Those engaging in conversation naturally tend to relate the other speakers statements to themselves. They may insert aspects of their lives into their replies, to relate to the other persons opinions or points of conversation. Again, all these are examples of different forms of listening.Finally there are discussions, debates, and arguments. While one can argue that these are all escalating forms of the same condition, the general meaning and reference of these three words is an explanation of an issue or a topic, compared and contrasted according to logical systemal rules, and factually affirmed by persuasion and logic to declare one viewpoint in better standing than the other. Bentley recommends that in order to maximize communication in each of these situations one should chose a train on which to listen again, based upon the situation and to use a combination of directive, facilitative and a ctive listening to have the most effective communication occur. His octet stages of listening cover non-listening, passive listening, judgmental listening, attentive listening, visual listening, reflective listening, active/creative listening, and directive listening. While the Bentley system has very logical and effective solutions to many communication dilemmas and situations, other experts take a more instinctive and generalized view of effective listening and non-verbal communication.In the article Turn listening into a powerful presence, Richard Harris states thatBetter-than-average listeners are keenly aware of the following important issues partnership, reviewing systematically, effort, star events, empathy, neutralizing snap judgments, and tenacity. Listening is not by any stretch of the imaginativeness a passive endeavor if practiced correctly or effectively. As a listener, one is always trying to receive or understand the meaning of the conversation, while dealing with al l the non-verbal communicational clues on a subconscious level. If you are blindfolded in a room with some friends, you could participate in conversation actively. However, your responses and understanding could range from a little bit off to very misdirected, depending on how many visual cues and gestures you miss due to the blindfold. Active listening is not just generating responses to sounds or answering the question. It requires the listeners to understand, interpret, and analyze what is heard. Today, the skill to listen is an invaluable skill in interpersonal communication. It improves personal relationships by reducing conflicts, fortify cooperation, as well as fostering understanding. Harris stresses the importance of practicing the issues that arise when holding a conversation, fully confident that a normal person can align and learn these techniques in order to become a more effective communicator.Sometimes effective listening is simply making sure that one is altogeth er engaged in the conversation, suspending judgment, and making evaluations after all the issues have been discussed. However, it is not natural for humans to listen in this form, and patience and practice are key aspects to developing natural listening skills, which depart eventually feel like a normal part of the mental acrobatics exercised on a daily basis by anyone who must communicate in any form. Effective listening is essential for anyone who wants to perform at his or her best, work easily and gracefully, and learn effectively. Few people realize that the art of listening has everything to do with intuition and little to do with the mental gymnastics of trying to concentrate on the words themselves. As you begin to see listening as an art and conversation as something that creates beauty, you will begin to understand how your own thoughts interfere with the experience. One expert argues that the less thinking that goes on during a conversation, the more effective the listen er is, because more of the actual conversation is retained and absorbed.(Gunn) This particular expert states that in his personal research, the more open and clear a person is when engaged in conversation, the more recall is available after the conversation. Intuition and feelings are also very important to this particular theorist. For effective listening, this theory requires one to be very aware of the feelings that are being inspired throughout the course of the conversation, to be stored in the memory and analyzed after the conversation is over, which one presumably will have more recall thereof since one did not get mentally distracted by emotions or thoughts during the conversation.Effective listening is also closely related to non verbal communicational forms such as gestures. Gestures are another cocksucker that can be used to maximize a listeners input on the conversation and its outcome. While this specific tool is very culture based, it can be very effective when interp reted and practiced correctly. One of the most common cultures to use gestures in the United States is the Latin-Americans. Gestures allow individuals to communicate a variety of feelings and thoughts, often together with body language in addition to words when they speak. For example, in the Cuban culture there is quite an amount of hand gesturing that leads throughout a conversation. Depending on the speed of the gesture shows the mental or emotional state of the person doing the speaking if smooth motions are made with the hands, the words being utter are meant to pacify or to be taken calmly, regardless of their content. Though gestures are not part of syntactic language, their processing takes place in the same areas of the brain used by speech and sign language.Another simple form of listening is reflective listening. Reflective listening is a communication dodge involving two key steps seeking to understand a speakers idea, then offering the idea back to the speaker, to conf irm the idea has been understood correctly. It attempts to reconstruct what the thickening is thinking and feeling and to relay this understanding back to the client. Reflective listening is a more specific strategy than the more general methods of active listening. It arose from Carl Rogers groom of client-centered therapy in counseling theory. (Hughes) It is important to observe the other persons actions and body language. Having the ability to interpret anyones body language allows the listener to develop a more complete understanding of the speakers words and possibly even the intent of the conversation, which may or may not be audibly stated. Having heard, the listener may restate or paraphrase what the speaker is saying. This is a technique for reassuring the speaker of ones undivided attention. It really does not imply understanding or agreement. In emotional conversations, a good listener may intuit or sense underlying feelings and emotions. For example, when in an argume nt, one would say I sense you are angry. Can you declaim me why? Again, the interplay between the non verbal clues and tools such as gestures and reflection all play a role in maximizing the effectiveness of the listener.While one cannot make a judgment call about the best way to listen, it is clear that the most definitive way to become an effective listener is to be mentally ready and to challenge oneself to practice skills that lead to naturally recalling and understanding everything that is express and intimated in conversation. While listening has much to do with the physical ability of the person, the intellectual application for effectiveness is more of a mental and psychological exercise that can only improve with constant practice. Not to trash the visually impaired, but the eyes are consistently the best source for all the cues that guide effective listeners. For many in the business world, the time spent congruous an effective listener will be priceless in terms of com munication that can open doors and opportunities. Furthermore, an effective listener that applies their professional success to their personal life can also ensure a very productive and emotionally satisfying life, because all of us have something to say, and everyone wants to be heard. In the words of Bishop TD Jakes, Listen with your ears. The ears work better when windpipes are closed. Listen with your mind. Many times words are based on a point of reference that you may not be aware of. Listen with your heart. Many times words do not convey whats in the heart so when you listen, hear what is said but also what is meant. Compassion is a critical part of understanding. It is difficult to love people without understanding them. Love seeks to understand. Listening with your heart will take away your natural propensity to be selfish. Listen with your heart. Many times words do not convey whats in the heart so when you listen, hear what is said but also what is meant. Compassion is a critical part of understanding. It is difficult to love people without understanding them. Love seeks to understand. Listening with your heart will take away your natural propensity to be selfish. Sound words to guide the spiritual health of his parishioners, but also very applicable to any successful individual in todays world.